Last year, I believe, I got to meet and interview best-selling author Mick Ukleja. I am kicking myself for not sharing this great moment in this blog.
At the time of the interview, he had been 7 times to Guatemala.
More of a pleasure visit instead than just business, right?
Well, it`s never been just pleasure, although he [his liaison] tries to make it fun. [laughs]
According to your research, what are the most common reasons why people experience self-doubt?
That`s a great question, by the way. I think we often times don`t understand that we have more strength and willpower that we do. We look at everybody else, looking at people and comparing ourselves. And so, I`m looking outside of myself, I`m looking at you and seeing: “Gee, he`s better looking than me, he`s smarter than me”. People never feel good enough: “It`s not enough, I`m not pretty enough, I`m not smart enough, I don`t have enough money”. Everybody, by the way, has self-doubt. The key is to realize that there`s no reason to have that self-doubt, that if we can begin to discover who we are deep down inside and discover that we have strengths and that we have talents, gifts, we can do just about it anything we want.
My problem will come when I compare myself with you. When I start comparing myself with you instead of seeing what I really have to offer I will always begin to self-doubt. Most people do that. If I were to say to you, “[What are you] on a scale of 1 to 10 (I`m not sure what you would say)” what would you say?
I would say I`m probably between a 6 or a 7.
And I would say you`re [grading yourself] low. I see about an 8 or 9 in you. But, see, we always doubt ourselves. What I began to realize is we`re all in the same boat and we need to, rather than have self-doubt, look and see what I have to offer. I call it “self-leadership” and self-leadership means that I need to discover the strategies, behaviors and habits that will help me exert influence over myself and I can deploy my best self. I have a lot to offer and if I develop my own gifts, my own strengths, my own talents and look for ways to serve other people.
By the way, that’s another thing, one of the key things about self-doubt… the best way I can get over my self-doubt is that I can look to solve one of your problems: how can I help you become better? And it’s amazing how that self-doubt begins to go away. When I start to serve other people, which are my motivations, I want to serve you, by looking for ways to make you better, my self-doubt begins to go away, begins to fade. So, life-long service, life-long I have to maximize my talents but I see those talents as me reaching out and serving someone else. And if people would just begin to do that and start to believe in themselves just a bit, and realize what they’ve been given, they have so much to be thankful for. It’s amazing how that works. Continue reading